today i missed service. feeling kinda left out. i need a way to break free. break through. this is killing me. the feeling of stagnated spirituality. in usher, in drumming, in my spiritual walk with God. i need to breakthrough. the last few weeks have been constant breaking through for me. im happy, but im not satisfied. it has to go to a whole new level.
its time to reach the holy of holies in my quiet time. no more normal worshipping. no more praying in vain. its time to break through. i love it when the presence of God comes. i treasure it. but i want more of You.
these few days have been food for thought for me. i need the time alone to think. i need the time alone with God, letting Him show me the way. its time to grow. no more potential team leader, no more section leader in usher, no more normal learning drummer, no longer an on fire christian. but i am going to let God excel me in all these areas. team leader, connect group leader, zone manager. 2nd in-charge, assistant chief usher. drummer, with the likes of hong hwee and ks, on the stage pulling down the presence of God. someone who can pray in the Spirit strong, bring down the presence of God, impact lives.
breaking through to a whole new level. cant wait for it to happen. :)
Sunday, June 28, 2009
Thursday, June 25, 2009
yeahhh! today was GREAT!
why do you want to play drums? i'll tell you why i want to play drums!
in my QT, as i start to close my eyes and listen to the worship song, i envision myself on the worship team, in the service setting, working together with pastors, working together with the worship leader, flowing along in the Spirit, pulling down the Presence of God!
i tell you, it is an awesome thing to 4D about. really. a vision that pushes me, a vision that makes me do what i do, to continue working towards that dream. how cool is that.
today, during sow, hong hwee asked me that question. i was taken aback for a moment, but i knew i already had the answer. because these few days, its all i dream about. to impact lives with the presence of God, the anointing of God, just like how i had been impacted, how i received during services' praise and worship.
its time to breakthrough. this holidays have really been about breaking through. the holidays are left with a few days. 3 days. friday, saturday and sunday. three and a half weeks have passed by so quickly. how i wish, i wish, i could grow more in God. how i wish, i wish that this holiday was even longer, even better, even more well spent, even more anointed, even more revelations, even more breakthroughs. revelations came, stayed in my heart. Presence of God came, lingered in my spirit. Holy Spirit came, spoke in my spirit.
yeahhh
my eyes betray me.
why do you want to play drums? i'll tell you why i want to play drums!
in my QT, as i start to close my eyes and listen to the worship song, i envision myself on the worship team, in the service setting, working together with pastors, working together with the worship leader, flowing along in the Spirit, pulling down the Presence of God!
i tell you, it is an awesome thing to 4D about. really. a vision that pushes me, a vision that makes me do what i do, to continue working towards that dream. how cool is that.
today, during sow, hong hwee asked me that question. i was taken aback for a moment, but i knew i already had the answer. because these few days, its all i dream about. to impact lives with the presence of God, the anointing of God, just like how i had been impacted, how i received during services' praise and worship.
its time to breakthrough. this holidays have really been about breaking through. the holidays are left with a few days. 3 days. friday, saturday and sunday. three and a half weeks have passed by so quickly. how i wish, i wish, i could grow more in God. how i wish, i wish that this holiday was even longer, even better, even more well spent, even more anointed, even more revelations, even more breakthroughs. revelations came, stayed in my heart. Presence of God came, lingered in my spirit. Holy Spirit came, spoke in my spirit.
yeahhh
my eyes betray me.
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
Today was in Popular waiting for my mum, and i saw this book, "five love languages of God", so i decided to pick it up to read it. here is the first page of it.
Susan was my first appointment of the day, and i felt like crying when i heard her story. Her father had committed suicide when she was 13. Her brother was killed in vietnam. Six months ago, her husband left her for another woman. She and her two small children now lived with her mother. I felt like crying... But susan wasn't crying. In fact, she was vibrant, almost radiant.
Assuming she was in denial of her grief, i said, "You must feel very rejected by your husband.''
"I did at first, but i've come to realize that my husband is not running from me. He is running from himself. He is a very unhappy man. I think he thought that our marriage would make him happy, but you and i know that only God can make a person truly happy.''
Thinking that perhaps susan was trying to spiritualize her pain, i said, ''you have been through alot in your life: your father's death, your brother's death, your husband's departure. How can you be so strong in your faith?''
''for one reason,'' she said. "I know that God loves me, so no matter what, He is always there for me.''
why i wanted to post this up was because this is almost what my life is like. throughout these few years of my walk with God, it wasnt easy. facing persecution from your closest friends relatives and even your own parents. But what really pushes me on is that everytime persecution comes, i can always feel God standing beside me, reassuring me, that He is always there for me. and its true. God has always been there for me, and i could always feel his presence within my heart. just 2 days ago, i felt his presence when everything seemed so lost and hopeless. i know i am never alone, because i know i have JESUS in me.
yesterday, during QT, i realized that the phrase "all for You" is such a powerful phrase. people have dedicated their lives to the ministry, leaders, pastors and people like us. all
from dictionary.com the meaning of all
every: all kinds; all sorts
nothing but; only
all means all! there is no other meaning. when we say all for You, it means surrendering all to Him. your life, your finances, your girlfriend, your family, things that you hold close to. everything!!!
yeah. God told me many many things. things that i will hold close to my heart till my deathbed. :)
Susan was my first appointment of the day, and i felt like crying when i heard her story. Her father had committed suicide when she was 13. Her brother was killed in vietnam. Six months ago, her husband left her for another woman. She and her two small children now lived with her mother. I felt like crying... But susan wasn't crying. In fact, she was vibrant, almost radiant.
Assuming she was in denial of her grief, i said, "You must feel very rejected by your husband.''
"I did at first, but i've come to realize that my husband is not running from me. He is running from himself. He is a very unhappy man. I think he thought that our marriage would make him happy, but you and i know that only God can make a person truly happy.''
Thinking that perhaps susan was trying to spiritualize her pain, i said, ''you have been through alot in your life: your father's death, your brother's death, your husband's departure. How can you be so strong in your faith?''
''for one reason,'' she said. "I know that God loves me, so no matter what, He is always there for me.''
why i wanted to post this up was because this is almost what my life is like. throughout these few years of my walk with God, it wasnt easy. facing persecution from your closest friends relatives and even your own parents. But what really pushes me on is that everytime persecution comes, i can always feel God standing beside me, reassuring me, that He is always there for me. and its true. God has always been there for me, and i could always feel his presence within my heart. just 2 days ago, i felt his presence when everything seemed so lost and hopeless. i know i am never alone, because i know i have JESUS in me.
yesterday, during QT, i realized that the phrase "all for You" is such a powerful phrase. people have dedicated their lives to the ministry, leaders, pastors and people like us. all
from dictionary.com the meaning of all
every: all kinds; all sorts
nothing but; only
all means all! there is no other meaning. when we say all for You, it means surrendering all to Him. your life, your finances, your girlfriend, your family, things that you hold close to. everything!!!
yeah. God told me many many things. things that i will hold close to my heart till my deathbed. :)
Sunday, June 21, 2009
just came back from supper with dilan, yeesiong and shaun leow. Haha. It was great. Wanted to hang out more with them but didnt really have the time to. Sian. Haha they are a great bunch of people. The time now is..... 122am! Haha.
Ytd was a jam-packed day. and it was cool! Cos i am gonna give 200 dollars by end of july. Its my covenant with Him ya know... Haha. Yesterday, events that happened before which puzzled me made sense. Yesterday, i experienced the Presence. Yesterday, 2 powerful sermons were preached. Yesterday, i got inspired by someone radical. Saturdays are always good!
Im gonna go off soon. Nothing much to do anyway. Yeah. See ya all! :)
Ytd was a jam-packed day. and it was cool! Cos i am gonna give 200 dollars by end of july. Its my covenant with Him ya know... Haha. Yesterday, events that happened before which puzzled me made sense. Yesterday, i experienced the Presence. Yesterday, 2 powerful sermons were preached. Yesterday, i got inspired by someone radical. Saturdays are always good!
Im gonna go off soon. Nothing much to do anyway. Yeah. See ya all! :)
Thursday, June 18, 2009
haha yeah. going to do a short one today. cos im going to worship soon. haha today was actually fruitful, yet unfruitful at the same time. went to study with f1 people, 1 hour + then went for sow. today's sow was good. learnt paradidos. duno if thats the way u spell it.
haha. need to dedicate everything to Him man. cant leave out an inch of my life that is not dedicated. thats not gonna work! need to pray too! haha. yeah. thats what im gonna do right now!
cya in another blogpost, or another world, or my dream later. :)
haha. need to dedicate everything to Him man. cant leave out an inch of my life that is not dedicated. thats not gonna work! need to pray too! haha. yeah. thats what im gonna do right now!
cya in another blogpost, or another world, or my dream later. :)
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
hi everyone! after that high post about yili, its time to blog about life!
today has been great, i went for an outing with jingheng's friends. tmr its gonna be outing again i think, then i will go study. yeah. need to study man! i dont want to be sec 4 next year again.
my life, is going to glorify You. not just my actions, but my achievements, the words i speak, the thoughts i think, the things i do. in school, at home, in church, in the world. my life is going to be a living sacrifice, for YOU.
these few days, i have gone to a whole new level. its time to break free of my old life and start a new life, i want to give more, i want to serve more, i want to do more. not just the lukewarm servant in the house of God, but an on fire christian who wants to give his all to Your house.
presence of God has been strong these few days. i want to dedicate everything to you, everything, including my thoughts. when i dedicate every thing to you, i know that my life will change. i love it when God talks to me, because that is when i will grow, stronger and a better relationship with You! i love the presence.
God told me, to cherish His presence more, i know that means something. and thats why i have been worshipping everyday, hours on end. the presence falls so strongly in my room, with lifted hands i sing, and next time, when i am on the throne on the stage, i will be the one pulling down the presence of God with my sticks and my drum kit, allowing all to feel the love of God. yeah, that is my vision.
a cgl by jc? a drummer before army? a chief usher? why not? its possible. Jeremiah 29:11, a future and a hope. with God with me, everything is possible. i believe it. time to push my faith to a whole new level. a whole new level of knowing You. :D
today has been great, i went for an outing with jingheng's friends. tmr its gonna be outing again i think, then i will go study. yeah. need to study man! i dont want to be sec 4 next year again.
my life, is going to glorify You. not just my actions, but my achievements, the words i speak, the thoughts i think, the things i do. in school, at home, in church, in the world. my life is going to be a living sacrifice, for YOU.
these few days, i have gone to a whole new level. its time to break free of my old life and start a new life, i want to give more, i want to serve more, i want to do more. not just the lukewarm servant in the house of God, but an on fire christian who wants to give his all to Your house.
presence of God has been strong these few days. i want to dedicate everything to you, everything, including my thoughts. when i dedicate every thing to you, i know that my life will change. i love it when God talks to me, because that is when i will grow, stronger and a better relationship with You! i love the presence.
God told me, to cherish His presence more, i know that means something. and thats why i have been worshipping everyday, hours on end. the presence falls so strongly in my room, with lifted hands i sing, and next time, when i am on the throne on the stage, i will be the one pulling down the presence of God with my sticks and my drum kit, allowing all to feel the love of God. yeah, that is my vision.
a cgl by jc? a drummer before army? a chief usher? why not? its possible. Jeremiah 29:11, a future and a hope. with God with me, everything is possible. i believe it. time to push my faith to a whole new level. a whole new level of knowing You. :D
haha im gonna post about NGAI YI LI! haha cos he told me to do it! so im doing it now! haha
when u see someone coming into church, someone tall, someone dark, someone with specs, you know its NGAI! wearing a cap maybe? joking around, being cool! yeah he is one cool guy. u gotta know him if you havent yet.
today me randyne, sunny and jing heng was joking about him! in one way he is similar to nicholas tan from f10. he got leg hair!!! when we serpent him, he is gonna get the same treatment as nic tan man! pluck out the leg hair until you hear the leg hair come out. piaakkk!
now the even better stuff about him! he has only been in church ever since easter, and he is rising up so fast! days since easter:74 days! in these 74 days, he has been drawing near to God, rising up in church, and even wants to join usher! how awesome is that! very awesomeeeeeeee
me and yili flow man! we flow because........ we got saved during easter! and when we were sec 2! mine was easter 2007, his was easter 2009! when we were both sec 2! hahahahaha. this is what we call flow man.
cant wait to get to know him more man! i know its gonna be awesome, i know its gonna be cool and i know we are gonna run this race together as a team, the dream team. running this race with the people i know, my leaders my friends and running this race fo God.
it is going to be brilliance, and i know we are going to be history makers! I BELIEVE
when u see someone coming into church, someone tall, someone dark, someone with specs, you know its NGAI! wearing a cap maybe? joking around, being cool! yeah he is one cool guy. u gotta know him if you havent yet.
today me randyne, sunny and jing heng was joking about him! in one way he is similar to nicholas tan from f10. he got leg hair!!! when we serpent him, he is gonna get the same treatment as nic tan man! pluck out the leg hair until you hear the leg hair come out. piaakkk!
now the even better stuff about him! he has only been in church ever since easter, and he is rising up so fast! days since easter:74 days! in these 74 days, he has been drawing near to God, rising up in church, and even wants to join usher! how awesome is that! very awesomeeeeeeee
me and yili flow man! we flow because........ we got saved during easter! and when we were sec 2! mine was easter 2007, his was easter 2009! when we were both sec 2! hahahahaha. this is what we call flow man.
cant wait to get to know him more man! i know its gonna be awesome, i know its gonna be cool and i know we are gonna run this race together as a team, the dream team. running this race with the people i know, my leaders my friends and running this race fo God.
it is going to be brilliance, and i know we are going to be history makers! I BELIEVE
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
cant stop thinking about it.
grown alot these few days, really really grown. cant wait to see what happens the next few weeks.
this is going to be a short post, really short, i promise!
i hope you get it. arghh! emo post!
seriously seriously hope you get it. cant say more. yeah
no one gets this post except me. and i hope it stays this way.
yeah. thats all. gottago. im gonna see a vision, and dream dreams while im sleeping. cya all!
grown alot these few days, really really grown. cant wait to see what happens the next few weeks.
this is going to be a short post, really short, i promise!
i hope you get it. arghh! emo post!
seriously seriously hope you get it. cant say more. yeah
no one gets this post except me. and i hope it stays this way.
yeah. thats all. gottago. im gonna see a vision, and dream dreams while im sleeping. cya all!
Sunday, June 14, 2009
bored out of my shell. nothing to do!!! spent my entire afternoon watch heroes...
something so powerful happened during the camp that i think it got engraved into my spirit. it was just awesome, wonderful and the feeling was great. now i know what dom meant when he said tears kept flowing and flowing. haha.
yesterday, something awesome happened too! cheryl told me something that i thought no one would find out. but she did! i was so shocked when she told me that. haha. its for me to know for you to find out! its really amazing. xiao jiao and josephine experienced it too! haha prophesy!
feeling tired now shall go sleep! i think i should start on my homework. 2 weeks left!
nobody nobody but you!
something so powerful happened during the camp that i think it got engraved into my spirit. it was just awesome, wonderful and the feeling was great. now i know what dom meant when he said tears kept flowing and flowing. haha.
yesterday, something awesome happened too! cheryl told me something that i thought no one would find out. but she did! i was so shocked when she told me that. haha. its for me to know for you to find out! its really amazing. xiao jiao and josephine experienced it too! haha prophesy!
feeling tired now shall go sleep! i think i should start on my homework. 2 weeks left!
nobody nobody but you!
Friday, June 12, 2009
Sunday, June 7, 2009
I'm determined. to do so many things. in such a short time, with limited resources. how i wish i had 25 hours a day, 8 days a week, 400 days a year. i could use the time.
feeling quite good, but feeling guilty at the same time. cant explain the feeling. guilty because i havent been spending much time with my parents, good because my team has grown! haha.
now i know why pastors and leaders talk so much about wisdom, its about going to church and being super on fire, but yet spend time with our parents at home, it will be wonderful if we can balance those 2, and this is the point where wisdom comes in. that is wisdom, doing the right thing at the right time, saying the right thing at the right time, thinking the right thing at the right time.
visions. i need visions and i know that will come sooner rather than later. i need visions to let me move on in my spiritual walk. its time to grow to another level, another level of knowing God.
I am determined. determined to repair broken relationships, forget about the petty hatred that i have been harbouring inside me, its time to forget and get back on track. :)
sometimes i wonder, wonder why i am in hc. but thinking of the destiny i have been put into, i forget about all the stress i go through, the people i put up with, and i thank God for His love and concern for me, never giving up on me. Thank YOU.
its time to win people. :)
feeling quite good, but feeling guilty at the same time. cant explain the feeling. guilty because i havent been spending much time with my parents, good because my team has grown! haha.
now i know why pastors and leaders talk so much about wisdom, its about going to church and being super on fire, but yet spend time with our parents at home, it will be wonderful if we can balance those 2, and this is the point where wisdom comes in. that is wisdom, doing the right thing at the right time, saying the right thing at the right time, thinking the right thing at the right time.
visions. i need visions and i know that will come sooner rather than later. i need visions to let me move on in my spiritual walk. its time to grow to another level, another level of knowing God.
I am determined. determined to repair broken relationships, forget about the petty hatred that i have been harbouring inside me, its time to forget and get back on track. :)
sometimes i wonder, wonder why i am in hc. but thinking of the destiny i have been put into, i forget about all the stress i go through, the people i put up with, and i thank God for His love and concern for me, never giving up on me. Thank YOU.
its time to win people. :)
Thursday, June 4, 2009
i feel good! today was sow and i think im starting to get my groooooooove back. yeah! haha. that definitely was a plus point today.
just listening to the song running after you and i realised that it made alot of sense in my life actually. God is just awesome. cant describe it anymore. its plain simple, yet complicated at the same time. i love it!
its late, and i still have an outing tmr. the holidays are awesome. just doing something everyday. lets give a brief overview of the past week.
saturday-went church till like 1145 reached home at 1. am!
sunday-went out with parents to eat sushi until almost cannot stand up cos too full
monday-sentosa outing!
tuesday-went to church to play bball!
wednesday-leader's meeting
thursday-sow drums!
friday-outing with tjh, bm and follow up training!
its a busy week, and i think next week might be busy too!
this year, i dunno if i have matured or what, but i discovered that people's needs are more than they appear.
attracting attention, trying to get love, blah blah blah. seen that in class. its obvious what their needs are and Jesus is there to fulfill them all. gotta bring them to know the One who can fulfill all their needs!
Holy Spirit make friends with me pleeeeease! :)
just listening to the song running after you and i realised that it made alot of sense in my life actually. God is just awesome. cant describe it anymore. its plain simple, yet complicated at the same time. i love it!
its late, and i still have an outing tmr. the holidays are awesome. just doing something everyday. lets give a brief overview of the past week.
saturday-went church till like 1145 reached home at 1. am!
sunday-went out with parents to eat sushi until almost cannot stand up cos too full
monday-sentosa outing!
tuesday-went to church to play bball!
wednesday-leader's meeting
thursday-sow drums!
friday-outing with tjh, bm and follow up training!
its a busy week, and i think next week might be busy too!
this year, i dunno if i have matured or what, but i discovered that people's needs are more than they appear.
attracting attention, trying to get love, blah blah blah. seen that in class. its obvious what their needs are and Jesus is there to fulfill them all. gotta bring them to know the One who can fulfill all their needs!
Holy Spirit make friends with me pleeeeease! :)
Tuesday, June 2, 2009
the holidays are here! decided to post something! haha.
these few days i have been going out alot! almost everyday, in fact. just hanging out with all the people. yesterday we went sentosa! my skin didnt get sun burn cos i have vitamin D! haha. but it was fun and tiring. cos we kept swimming to the other island then swim back. then swim to take ball, then throw back. haha!
today went out with jonny. man i think its the last time im gonna see him. he is going to be gone on thursday! one of my closest friends in school, leaving for canada... im gonna miss you! feels sad.
starting to watch heroes season 2 again. awesome episodes, awesome powers by a cool creator of the show! haha. Awesome!
problems may come, but whats powerful is that you stay bigger than the problem that is coming your way!
these few days i have been going out alot! almost everyday, in fact. just hanging out with all the people. yesterday we went sentosa! my skin didnt get sun burn cos i have vitamin D! haha. but it was fun and tiring. cos we kept swimming to the other island then swim back. then swim to take ball, then throw back. haha!
today went out with jonny. man i think its the last time im gonna see him. he is going to be gone on thursday! one of my closest friends in school, leaving for canada... im gonna miss you! feels sad.
starting to watch heroes season 2 again. awesome episodes, awesome powers by a cool creator of the show! haha. Awesome!
problems may come, but whats powerful is that you stay bigger than the problem that is coming your way!
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